I’m gaining weight. Well, I’m not actually gaining anything since every time I’ve weighed myself I seem to be maintaining the same weight give or take half a pound. I notice it when I see myself in the mirror. When I first got here my hip bones would slightly peek out, my wrists were a little more delicate, my fingers were slimmer, my jawline and cheekbones more prominent and now it’s harder to see. I’ve gotten some padding.
It’s weird feeling this way because when I weighed 175 I was oblivious to my weight and thought I looked good. But now I see myself and I don’t like that I don’t look the way I did when I left New York. I still have an overall good feeling about myself, but I am much more conscious of what my body can look like and I don’t want to lose it.
It’s hard for someone like me to maintain how my figure looks because naturally I’m very lazy and my body is very receptive to inaction. In New York I had to walk no matter what, but this city demands that you sit on your ass at all times and that is not healthy at all. I am keeping track of what I eat and try to took for myself when time permits, which is why I’m at least staying the same weight, but the life I’m leading here is extremely sedentary. I am losing muscle mass instead of fat.
I can’t wait to move into our new apartment. We got approved to move into this shiny new building in Midtown! It’s a little more in rent than what we were paying in NY but the amenities available to us as well as the location make it worth it. Not to mention that we will be the first people ever in the unit! I am actually looking forward to making use of the gym and pool because I have absolutely no excuse to not work out since the facilities are in my building.
Technically, X will be the only one moving in. I will visit every other day until we finally tie the knot. We still haven’t set a date yet, but it’s looking like end of May or some time in June. Why am I not moving in right away even though we lived together in New York? Because over here it will be harder to escape the ever judging/gossiping presence of the desi community. I personally don’t give a fuck, but I do care about my parents, and they care about keeping up appearances or what have you so we are keeping it halal. We’ll be married soon enough anyway. Plus, the time spent apart makes our hang out time even better.
Oh yes, let’s not forget some important news. X met my parents and my brother. They all seem to like him and he likes them. I honestly had no idea what to expect when I walked with him through the door of my parents’ house but I was very pleasantly surprised. My hands were shaking because I was so nervous, but once I saw that everything was going well I calmed down immediately. My dad had a lot of questions, but X was on a roll and made a great impression on everyone.
I’m also starting to look for full-time work as a designer. I have the best resume I’ve ever had in my life (yes, I paid for someone to write it) and am currently reworking my portfolio to show more of my newer work. Over here we can’t be late or strike a deal with the landlord so a steady check is absolutely necessary.
One of my current clients keeps mentioning that they are thinking of putting me on a retainer, which would be amazing as I’d never have to go to work, but I cannot wait around hoping that they will actually go through with it. Maybe if I tell them I’m on the hunt for a job they will get their asses into action! They keep telling me after every completed project how good I am. So good in fact that one of the ad networks they’re on had to tell them to tell me to not make their materials look so good (“best we’ve ever seen” good!) because the ads are making the other people on the network look terrible. HAHA! No kidding. After that I was actually instructed to make things look shitty. Which was, quite surprisingly, really hard.
Whether or not I get the retainer, I will still continue to work with them because they are the people that have kept me afloat when times were rough and the work given is very easy to take care of since the project manager and I seem to have some kind of mind-meld where I design exactly what she wants in the first try with very minor revisions.
Anyhow. I’ve got to get back to work. I am so close with this portfolio!!! My eyes aren’t focusing properly and I have to stay up all night. Again. Luckily I passed out on the couch for a few hours by mistake this afternoon so tonight’s long haul wont be as excruciating as last night (I hope!)
